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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26513050">Impressions - a Wreckage Sidefic</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/AngelSelene/pseuds/AngelSelene'>AngelSelene</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Wreckage [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Criminal Minds (US TV), Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>5+1 Things, Ed Swears, M/M, Podfic Available, Post-FMA:B, Post-Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood, background Roy Mustang/Edward Elric, canon divergent S9 Criminal Minds, outsider pov</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 03:21:01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>7,002</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26513050</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/AngelSelene/pseuds/AngelSelene</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Dave Rossi has officially recruited Ed Elric for the BAU. </p><p>5 First Impressions + 1 Second One.</p><p>Now with a <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30267819/chapters/74976141">PODFIC</a>!</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Derek Morgan/Spencer Reid</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Wreckage [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1924888</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>101</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>889</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Hotch</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Sidefic for <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26477992/chapters/64521538">Nothing Beautiful About the Wreckage</a>. This will make <em> more </em>sense if you read the first chapter of that first, but really all you need to know for these is that Ed and Roy are in the BAU world and Ed's been recruited by Rossi. These are mostly shorter, but long enough that I didn't want it to be a oneshot.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Hotch is, of course, the first one that Dave introduces Ed to. He’s Hotch, so he notices that Ed keeps a solid three feet of distance between each of them and his hands in his pockets, so Hotch aborts the automatic motion to offer his hand.</p>
<p>They do the usual rundown, then send Ed down to the bullpen to wait. Dave manages to contain himself for approximately ten seconds after the door closes behind Ed.</p>
<p>“What do you think?” he asks.</p>
<p>Hotch flips through the paperwork, but Dave can tell he’s not really reading it. “Hard to tell. He’s young, but so was Reid.”</p>
<p>“Penelope didn’t find anything to support or contradict his story about being raised off-the-grid,” Dave offers.</p>
<p>Hotch does the thing where he doesn’t actually sigh, but he looks like he’d really like to. “Maybe he was in WitSec, maybe he really was raised by fundamentalists. He has secrets, but you already knew that when you recruited him.”</p>
<p>“I doubt it was WitSec,” Dave says. “Either they would have told us to stay away from him, moved him, or Penelope would have found him.”</p>
<p>“Well, he doesn’t hit my radar the way that fundamentalist-minded people usually do. So I guess you have to take him at his word that he was smart enough to see through the indoctrination on his own, and left.”</p>
<p>Dave chuckles a little ruefully. “It does seem unlikely, doesn’t it?”</p>
<p>Hotch does sigh this time. “It does,” he concedes. “But you recruited him anyway.”</p>
<p>It’s not a question, not quite. Dave could ignore it and Hotch would leave it, but even though Dave has the experience on Hotch, Hotch is the senior agent and technically his boss, so he has the right to know. “He figured out something we missed on a case I used in a presentation. Not only did he figure it out, he had enough faith in his judgment and enough self-confidence to approach me after and make sure I took him seriously.”</p>
<p>“And he was right,” Hotch adds.</p>
<p>Nodding in agreement, Dave admits, “And he was right.”</p>
<p>Hotch stares at him for another long moment, then says, “So we ignore the secrets, I guess.”</p>
<p>It’s Dave’s turn to give Hotch a long look. “Are you going to be okay with that?”</p>
<p>Hotch frowns but says, “I trust your judgement. You wouldn’t bring him into this team if you really thought he was a risk.”</p>
<p>Dave doesn’t know if it’s a compliment or an insult, so he decides to take it as a compliment. “I’ll just go get him situated then.”</p>
<p>It does get him a quirk of a grin from Hotch, and Dave takes that as a win.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Morgan</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Morgan meets Ed.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Rossi gave them the heads up about the new BAU member—Elric—but being told about someone was never the same as meeting them. Derek can’t help but compare him to Spencer, since he remembers when Spencer was young and awkward and painfully new, and Elric is the same age that Spencer was.</p><p>Elric might be the same age Spencer was and he might be a genius, but it’s immediately apparent that they are nothing alike.</p><p>Spencer had <em>seemed</em> young. He’d been gangly and self-conscious and, although he was sure of his intelligence, he wasn’t always sure of his place. It took him years to find his footing, to find his confidence, to stop feeling his youth was a handicap. Elric knows he belongs. There isn’t the most remote doubt in him.</p><p>Elric is short, but he’s solid. He holds himself with a lazy readiness that Derek has only seen in highly trained fighters. When Derek approaches, Elric visibly sizes him up, settles his stance, but he keeps his hands in his pockets.</p><p>“Elric, right?” Derek asks.</p><p>Dark brown, almost black eyes meet Derek’s own. Derek can’t decide if they’re out of place with his surfer’s tan and yellow-blond hair, but they seem somehow not quite right. Regardless, they’re piercing and there is a weight to them that Derek is used to seeing in veteran agents, not rookies.</p><p>“Who’s asking?” Elric demands.</p><p>“Special Agent Derek Morgan, BAU,” he says, biting back his irritation and extending his hand.</p><p>Elric doesn’t relax as much as stand down. “I don’t shake,” he says, not taking his hands out of his pockets. “But I’m Ed. I guess we’ll be working together?”</p><p>It’s probing, curious. Derek has worked for Jason Gideon, has worked alongside Spencer Reid for a decade, and has tracked down a number of horrifyingly brilliant minds over the years. Derek knows genius when he sees it, and he can practically see the calculations that Elric is running, how quickly his mind is processing information, assessing and reassessing, presenting and discarding hypotheses.</p><p>“Yeah, we will. Welcome to the team,” Derek says, pulling his hand back as naturally as he can.</p><p>“Yeah, welcome me,” he says, and he sounds… resigned?</p><p>Derek is already over this kid’s attitude. “Look, if you don’t want to be here, then you don’t have to be here,” he says.</p><p>That finally gets Elric’s undivided attention, and a small grin pulls at one side of his mouth.</p><p>“Got some bite there, I see.” He says it like he approves. As if <em>Derek</em> should be pleased to have his approval. Derek isn’t a violent man, but the impulse to knock Elric on his ass is strong. He’ll just have to find a way to spar with the kid and put him in his place.</p><p>He does wonder what the hell was Rossi thinking, bending over backwards to get this kid through the system and onto the team?  </p><p>“Am I supposed to have a desk or anything?” Elric asks. It ignores Derek’s snapping, but he lets it go for the moment, annoyed at how easily the kid is getting under his skin.</p><p>“Right over here,” Derek says.</p><p>Elric follows him, and Derek motions him toward the desk. He’s across from JJ.</p><p>“Feel free to personalize it however you want,” Derek tells him, then steps back so Elric won’t be crowded.</p><p>“Looks like most of you have the same décor of ‘excessive paperwork,’” Elric comments dryly. He sits at on the chair, then finally pulls his hands out of his pockets to adjust the height.</p><p>He’s wearing white gloves. Derek’s brain automatically ticks through the different reasons someone might refuse to shake hands and wear gloves, and figures it’s a fifty-fifty chance that it’s OCD or Elric is just a major germaphobe. Once the chair is adjusted, Elric leaves it alone, and he doesn’t turn in his chair to put his back to Derek. Hypervigilance? Or paranoia? Derek knows they’re not supposed to profile each other, but Elric is new and odd, and Derek has been a profiler for more than ten years at this point—to some degree it’s unconscious these days. Besides, he already has serious doubts about this kid’s ability to be a team player.</p><p>“You were given your credentials?” Derek asks.</p><p>“Sure was. Apparently I can change it from gobbledygook when I actually log in,” Elric says.</p><p>No hesitation. No doubt. He’s still not happy or flattered to have been recruited by one of the most brilliant minds in profiling. To Elric, it just seems… mundane.</p><p>He probably shouldn’t say anything, but he definitely shouldn’t bottle this up, so he says, “You know, I can think of half a dozen agents who’d give their right arms for a chance to get into the BAU.”</p><p>Elric meets his eyes and raises an eyebrow. “Their right arm?” he asks. “Really? For a <em>job</em>?” He says the last word with obvious disdain.</p><p>“Most of us consider this to be a calling, not a job,” Derek defends.</p><p>He can imagine how Spencer would have dealt with Derek being this confrontational, this aggressive on first meeting, and it isn’t pretty. But where Spencer would have somehow both crumpled and started spewing information like it could somehow physically shield him, Elric pulls a foot up, setting it on the edge of the seat, laces his fingers together in front of the shin, and then looks at Derek like he’d finally said something interesting.</p><p>“There’s always going to be another psycho. If you spend all of your life chasing them, all you’ve done is made yourself another victim.”</p><p>Derek snorts and goes to his own desk, not dignifying that with a response. He wonders if it’s too late to start a bet on how long the new kid lasts, because if he were profiling Elric, he’d give it a couple months, tops.</p><p>Then again, Rossi recruited him and had to fight hard to get the kid hired with such a sketchy background. Derek hopes he’s wrong and that Elric is as valuable an asset as Rossi thinks he could be. Derek isn’t sure he’d bet on it yet.</p><p>Still, his words linger in Derek’s mind.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>If I were going to post every-other day like I said, this would be on Monday, but my self-control in not posting is not great, so--Surprise!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. JJ</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>JJ and Ed meet.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>JJ is running a little late to the first meeting with their new recruit. It means that she doesn’t get to meet him formally until they’re on the jet. His hair is more yellow-blond than her own, and that’s unusual enough that when she seats herself across from him, she says, “We’ll probably get mistaken for siblings.”</p>
<p>Elric turns to look at her from where he’d been staring out the window. He’s fidgety, nervous, shoulders holding tension, but he lets her distract him, raising an equally yellow-blond eyebrow, so his color probably didn’t come out of a bottle either. “Just because we’re both blond?” he asks.</p>
<p>“Yeah, pretty much,” she admits.</p>
<p>“We don’t look anything alike,” he points out. And he’s not wrong—long, yellow-blond hair aside, they don’t look alike. Elric has a warm complexion, one that makes her think of long summers spent outside. He’s got the kind of features that get noticed, that, if not for the strength of his brow and the squareness of his jaw, would be almost pretty. Nothing about the shape of his face, the set of his eyes, the or the curve of his mouth or nose match her own.</p>
<p>She shrugs. “Some people will just see the blonde and assume.”</p>
<p>He rolls his eyes, and he doesn’t say <em>that’s stupid</em>, but he’s obviously thinking it.</p>
<p>The jet starts moving. The pilot informs them that takeoff is soon, and Elric tenses up.</p>
<p>“Not a fan of flying?” she asks.</p>
<p>He looks defensive for a minute, before his shoulders drop. “That obvious?”</p>
<p>She gives him a commiserating smile. “You’re among profilers now,” she says. “You should get used to us noticing the little things. It’s kind of in the job description.”</p>
<p>That earns her a self-deprecating grin, and he says, “Yeah, I should probably get used to it.”</p>
<p>“So, why do you dislike flying?” she asks, trying to keep him talking.</p>
<p>“Don’t like it or dislike it. This is my first time flying. I’ve read up on all the physics and how it works, but.” He shrugs again. “I know the science behind it, but even then, it still kind of boggles my mind that something made of this much steel flies.”</p>
<p>“My brother’s the same way. He will make the seven-hour drive down to see me one hundred times out of a hundred, even though the flight is only a couple hours.”</p>
<p>Elric perks up, focusing on her as the plane takes off, though the grip he has on the armrests tell her how determined he is to ignore it. “You have a brother?”</p>
<p>“Three, actually. All older. You?”</p>
<p>Despite his expressive face, Elric’s eyes are dark and difficult to read, but she can tell he’s not looking at her when he says, “A brother. Younger.”</p>
<p>She’s curious because it’s not exactly the way she speaks about her sister, but there’s loss there, pain and weight. Affection too. The short answer and the bittersweet tone tells her that he doesn’t want to talk about it. JJ is tempted to push anyway, but decides that it’s a lot to ask for in the first “official” meeting.</p>
<p>“So, do you prefer Edward or Ed?” she asks, changing the topic.</p>
<p>His eyes focus back on her. “I don’t really care. Ed’s fine.”</p>
<p>Smiling, she says, “Call me JJ, then.”</p>
<p>“Not Jenny?” he teases.</p>
<p>She scoffs. “Jennifer or JJ. Not Jen, and <em>never</em> Jenny,” she informs. Then because she’s a girl with three older brothers and she knows how to hit where it hurts, she adds, “Not unless you want to be Eddie.”</p>
<p>He squawks indignantly. “<em>Not</em> Eddie!”</p>
<p>The grins she flashes is triumphant. “Ed it is then,” she says, and she’s not sorry to sound smug.</p>
<p>Ed narrows his eyes at her, but a grin pulls at his lips. “You are <em>so</em> not a Jenny anyway.”</p>
<p>It startles a laugh out of her, and she thinks they’re going to get along just fine.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>JJ is the shortest! But she and Ed give me total sibling vibes.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Spencer</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Spencer's impressions of Ed.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Spencer dislikes being called a genius, even if he technically fits the definition. He prefers the more fantastical definitions, the ones that laymen rarely know.</p>
<p>But it’s not the first definition that people think of when they hear the word genius and apply it to Spencer. No, they think of the final definition under the noun.</p>
<p><em>5)</em> <em>plural usually </em><em>geniuses</em></p>
<ol>
<li><em>a single strongly marked capacity or aptitude </em></li>
<li><em>extraordinary intellectual power especially as manifested in creative activity</em></li>
<li><em>a person endowed with extraordinary mental superiority especially <strong>: </strong>a person with a very high IQ</em></li>
</ol>
<p>When Spencer realizes that Elric must be the modern definition of a genius to have been recruited so young, he prepares for the inevitable comparisons. How much like Spencer is he? How much will they relate to one another? Will he be reserved except for when his knowledge pours out of him like a broken dam? Will he be a narcissist, obsessed with his own superiority? Will he struggle with social situations, understanding the pieces of a profile but sometimes unable to apply them to actual people?</p>
<p>Spencer doesn’t think Rossi has recruited Elric as a replacement, but even in his own head, it sounds defensive. Rossi values Spencer’s intelligence, his skills, he respects Spencer as a member of the team, treats him as part of his family. There is no reason for Rossi to be looking to replace Spencer, and Spencer knows that—he really does.</p>
<p>But there’s that little voice in the back of his head that he doesn’t know if he’ll ever outgrow. It’s the voice that was always let down when he was the last one chosen to play a game, or, often, refused even a sympathy last-spot on a team. Even if he didn’t actually want to play the game or he thought it was stupid, humans are social creatures. The instinct to be part of a group, part of the pack, is strong, and being constantly overlooked or deliberately excluded as a child leaves its scars. So he <em>knows</em> Rossi isn’t trying to replace him, but being the genius kid on the team has always been Spencer’s role, and the idea of giving that up, giving up the first role in which he fit on the team—it’s hard.</p>
<p>He’s been on the team for over ten years at this point, since he was twenty-two, just like Elric is now. Spencer is over thirty now, and he’s far from the awkward, uncertain young man he was. His need to belong made him almost fragile in retrospect. He doesn’t cling to his doctorates like shields anymore because he can command respect and authority on his own. He’s still a genius, as much as he dislikes the nomenclature, but he’s not the <em>kid genius</em> anymore.</p>
<p>It doesn’t make letting go of that role, that place that defined him long after he outgrew it, any easier. He tries to see it as passing on a torch, readying himself to hopefully be a mentor, which is a role he has never played before (Henry doesn’t count—Spencer’s more like a favored uncle than a mentor). He’s both nervous about it and oddly looking forward to it.</p>
<p>The idea of passing on the torch of being the kid genius goes out the window the first time he lays eyes on Edward Elric in person.</p>
<p>Elric is not someone Spencer, even as a profiler, would automatically identify as a genius. He short and solid. He moves with a fluidity that speaks of training that could be dance but was more likely martial arts. Dark eyes move about the room almost lazily, but there’s a sharpness, an attention to the gaze that reminds Spencer of Gideon’s hypervigilance. There’s an almost visible bubble of personal space surrounding him. He doesn’t reach out to other people, moves out of arm’s length in a casual way that speaks of long practice. He is centered and grounded where he stands, giving the feeling that if Spencer pushed him, <em>Spencer</em> might move more than he does. He’s comfortable and confident in his own skin in ways that most adults aren’t until they’re in their midtwenties, and Spencer wasn’t until he was even older.</p>
<p>No, Elric doesn’t evoke the modern idea of a genius in Spencer’s mind—he embodies the older, fantastic, almost obsolete definitions of <em>genius</em>.</p>
<p>
  <em>1) plural : genii</em>
</p>
<ol>
<li><em>an attendant spirit of a person or a place</em></li>
<li><em>a person who influences another for good or bad. </em></li>
</ol>
<p>
  <em>2) a strong leaning or inclination : penchant</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>3) a peculiar, distinctive, or identifying character or spirit</em>
</p>
<ol>
<li><em>the associations and traditions of a place</em></li>
<li><em>a personification or embodiment especially of a quality or condition</em></li>
</ol>
<p>
  <em>4) spirit, jinni</em>
</p>
<p>Somehow, it’s enough to settle Spencer’s anxiety. Elric is not here to take his place because they do not occupy the same place. The word <em>genius</em> may be applied to them both, but they are homonyms, and the resemblance between them seems to start and stop with the applied definition of that word.</p>
<p>If Elric reminds Spencer of anyone on the team, it’s Derek. Derek with his quiet confidence, his sturdiness, his obvious strength. But where Derek is a rock of stability, Elric brings to mind a maelstrom. He is the tempest that can sweep in and throw everything into disarray, perhaps revealing secrets and things long lost in his wake. Spencer suspects that Elric may change the whole dynamic of their team because this is not a man who is used to being idle, who will be satisfied behind the scenes.</p>
<p>Spencer can’t decide if he’s dreading or looking forward to it.  </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This is a bonus post today as a thank you for all the lovely feedback and kudos Wreckage (in general) has gotten. </p>
<p>And yes, the definitions of "genius" are taken straight from Merriam-Webster. You have no idea how delighted I was when I saw the fantastical definitions.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Penelope</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Penelope finally gets some one-on-one time with Ed.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Penelope hasn’t had much of a chance to actually meet or even really talk to their new member over the past few weeks. He doesn’t seem particularly flustered by the way she and Morgan still talk to each other, so there’s that at least? Not that anyone’s on the actual BAU team has been upset by it so far—other FBI agents with their panties in a twist and no sense of humor, maybe, but not the actual BAU members…</p><p>Is she borrowing trouble? It seems like she’s borrowing trouble.</p><p>Then again, from what she’s seen, the kid doesn’t exactly scream <em>professional</em> or <em>official</em> anyway. And he is kind of a kid—only twenty-two. Another baby genius, just like Reid was once upon a time. She can do with someone else on the team who isn’t so tight-laced sometimes, who maybe colors outside the lines a little.</p><p>“Whoa!” A hand on her shoulder steadies her as a solid wall of black and gold shifts to the side, but it doesn’t stop her from dropping her stack of tablets.</p><p>“Oh, I’m so sorry!” she blurts.</p><p>“My fault,” Elric says, bending to help her pick up her tablets. He hands her tablets with one hand, while the other rubs at his eye. “Fuckin’ contact is outta whack, and I wasn’t watching,” he explains.</p><p>Tablets gathered—and unharmed, there’s a reason she insisted on shelling out for the good cases if the team was going to use these in the field—Penelope gets her first really good, up-close look at Elric. He might be young, but there’s a cut to his jaw, lines around his mouth, and a furrow between golden eyebrows that make her think <em>serious</em> and <em>grown</em>. He is incredibly striking though. His all-black attire makes his skin and hair virtually glow in contrast.</p><p>“I don’t wear contacts very often, but I’ve got some eye drops in my office, if that might help?” she offers tentatively. “And I have a mirror.”</p><p>He’s still rubbing at his eye, pausing as if to test it, then rubbing again.</p><p>“That’s…” he trails off, and she thinks he’s about to reject the offer, but after another rub, he stands and says, “Thanks.”</p><p>She gives him a little smile and leads him to her office. She sets the tablets down and sits in her chair, digging into a drawer to pull out one of her spare eyedrop bottles and her hand mirror, handing them both over. Elric takes them and glances at her. She about jumps out of her skin when she sees what looks like two eyeballs staring at her from one eye—one dark brown, one cat-yellow.</p><p>He sees her reaction, opens the mirror, and mutters, “Fuck, no wonder,” under his breath. He quickly tilts his head back and uses the eye drops until they’re flowing down his cheek, before setting them down. He pulls off his left glove—and okay, Penelope can admit it’s a little weird that he wears gloves, and not like, <em>medical-type </em>gloves, but like, kind of weirdly formal gloves—then grabs the mirror again. He uses his left hand to both hold the eye open and shift what <em>she thought</em> had been a second eye, but is actually a contact, around until the eerie yellow iris disappears behind it. He blinks rapidly, tilts his head back again, adds a couple more drops to both eyes, then blinks them away, wiping his cheek with his sleeve. “That’s so much better,” he says with relief, closing her mirror and handing it back to her.</p><p>Staring as she takes it back, she says, “Your eyes are <em>yellow</em>.”</p><p>He blinks dark brown eyes at her, but the image of that bright, <em>golden</em> yellow is seared in her mind.</p><p>Wincing, he puts his black glove back on. “Yeah,” he mumbles. “Mind keeping that to yourself?” he asks.</p><p>“But… <em>why</em>?”</p><p>“Because they freak people out.”</p><p>Penelope can see why. She’s a nerd, so she’s watched any number of shows and movies with people who have yellow eyes, and Elric’s are <em>nothing</em> like the contacts or special effects she’s seen.</p><p>“Do you actually <em>need</em> contacts?” she asks, suddenly curious.</p><p>He grimaces. “No.”</p><p>“So they’re just colored contacts, then?”</p><p>Putting the lid back on the eye drops, he says, “Is there a point to this?”</p><p>“I’ve just never seen anyone with eyes like that so—”</p><p>“No one has,” he cuts her off. “That’s the problem. People stare. Religious and superstitious people freak the fuck out. It’s just easier if I wear the fuckin’ contacts, okay?”</p><p>She’s not really religious and only a little superstitious, and she’s freaking out, so she can see what he means. “Must suck, having to wear contacts when you don’t need them,” she says.</p><p>Shrugging he says, “Better than gaining some creepy stalker because they’re fascinated with ’em,” he says in the kind of tone that says he’s speaking from experience.</p><p>Yeah, she can see this little baby goth of golden hotness picking up a stalker, especially with those eyes. “What happened?” she asks. “With your stalker?”</p><p>“Kicked his ass,” he says, not bragging, almost as if he’s irritated by the whole thing. “Heard his testicle retrieval surgery was a success. Didn’t have a problem with him after that.”</p><p>If it weren’t for the bored tone, Penelope would think he’s pulling her leg. “He didn’t report you to the police?”</p><p>Elric snorts. “For breaking into my apartment and getting his ass kicked for it? Uh, no.”</p><p>“How long ago was this?”</p><p>“First year of college?” he says, thinking back.</p><p>“And that was really the end of it?” she asks, a little skeptical. She does work with the BAU, after all. She’s seen obsession go <em>really</em> bad.</p><p>He gives her a grin that’s all teeth and no mercy. “I was very clear that if he came near me again, retrieving his balls would be the least of his concerns. Fuckin’ punk stayed the fuck away after that.”</p><p>Penelope has to bite her lips because she’s not sure if she wants to applaud his handling of the situation or scold him for the way he did it. She’s leaning towards applauding and saying <em>way to go, sister!</em> but she doesn’t know if he’d be okay with it. He doesn’t seem like his problem was with the attention coming from a guy—since there hasn’t been a hint of complaint about a <em>guy</em> making eyes at him—just that the attention was unwanted, which has her gaydar sitting up and paying a bit of attention. Even in the BAU, she knows very few straight men who wouldn’t be as bothered by a man coming onto them or paying unwanted attention without including that it being a <em>man</em> was part of why it was so bothersome.</p><p>The snarky part of her has had to hold its tongue on more than one occasion to keep from saying, <em>and you think women like that kind of attention any better?</em> One sensitivity training because of the way she and Morgan rib each other is enough, thank you. No need to reopen that can of worms.</p><p>Noticing Elric eyeing her setup, she decides a change of subject is in need. She spreads her arms and says, “What do you think of the lovely shrine of knowledge?”</p><p>“Is it really necessary to have so many screens?” he asks.</p><p>“Yes, as a matter of fact, it is,” she tells him with a smile.</p><p>His eyebrow twitches. “So you do all the… searching stuff?”</p><p>“I certainly do. Your local goddess of tech and databases,” she informs, it rolling off her tongue before she realizes that maybe it shouldn’t.</p><p>Elric’s mouth twitches up in a hint of a grin, and it’s the first one that’s near genuine she’s seen. “Girls and their machines,” he says, the tone oddly fond.</p><p>It’s an unusual enough comment that she can’t help but pry. “Know other girls who like their tech?” she asks.</p><p>Tactical error. The smile fades and his eyes go distant in that universal look of <em>remembered grief</em>. “Yeah,” he says, softly, sadly. “I did.”</p><p>There’s weight there, behind that sorrow. More than she would expect a twenty-two-year-old to carry. “Do you want to see what I can find out about you?”</p><p>He shrugs, coming back to her. “Not much. Lived off the grid till I left home and took the tests to get into college,” he says.</p><p>She actually knows that because like hell she could resist digging into their newest member. Being able to find very little had been more than mildly infuriating. His college workload and scores were impressive though.</p><p>“Not even a little curious?” she teases.</p><p>“Not really a tech person,” he admits, sticking his hands in his pockets and eyeing the monitors with barely hidden suspicion.</p><p>She sighs. <em>Why does this team only attract geniuses who are technophobes? </em>she wonders. Glancing at him out of the corner of her eye, she admits, <em>at least they’re easy on the eyes.</em></p><p>“Thanks for this, again, and for not saying anything,” he says, apparently done being surrounded by so much tech. “I’ll replace the eyedrops.”</p><p>She smiles. “You don’t need to.”</p><p>He raises an eyebrow. “Equivalent exchange,” he says, and he says it like it means something <em>more</em> that she doesn’t understand. “If there’s anything I can help you with, let me know.”</p><p>“Sure,” she says, turning to watch him leave. He’s not tall, but his shoulders are broad and fill the doorway, golden braid snaking almost to his waist.</p><p><em>Too bad I’m not his type</em>, she thinks, turning back to her setup. At least she can still enjoy the scenery.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I can't decide who was harder--Spencer or Penelope. They were both tricky though...</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. A Second Impression</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>... and a second impression.</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Hey, Morgan,” Elric says. “Got a minute?”</p><p>It had been a rough one, but Derek can admit, Elric not only handled it like an absolute pro, he’d been instrumental in figuring out the unsub’s motivation and narrowing down where he’d hidden. He’s only been on the team for about three months, but Derek had to reluctantly give it to Rossi. Elric had been worth calling in some favors for.</p><p>That doesn’t mean that Derek actually likes the kid. Still, he can be the adult here.</p><p>Spencer hesitates as he is leaving, as if uncertain if Derek should be left alone with Elric. Derek gives him a reassuring smile and waves him off, leaving him and Elric alone.</p><p>“Look, about the case,” Derek starts, wanting to get this over with and wanting to give credit where it is due.</p><p>Elric looks surprised for a minute before something seems to click. “It’s nothing—”</p><p>“No, it isn’t nothing.”</p><p>“It’s really—don’t worry about it.”</p><p>“No, you really did—”</p><p>“Just doing my job—”</p><p>“Damn it, Elric,” Derek snaps, interrupting him. “I’m trying to tell you that you did a good job today.”</p><p>“I <em>know</em>,” Elric says, long-suffering. “I was trying to <em>stop</em> you. Fuck’s sake.”</p><p>Derek crosses his arms, frustrated. “You did a good job today,” he says again, at least partly to watch Elric squirm. “Why don’t you want me to tell you that?”</p><p>“Because it’s <em>you</em>,” Elric says like it should be obvious. “You don’t like me, and it kind of creeps me out when you try to be nice to me. So seriously, save the compliments.”</p><p>Now Derek is the one who is confused, and he leans against his desk. “Who says I don’t like you?”</p><p>The look Elric gives him is so flat, he has to suppress a wince. He thought he was hiding it better than <em>that</em>. Besides, whether or not he likes Elric personally, he can admit the kid is an asset to the team, and they’ve managed to be perfectly civil—</p><p><em>Oh</em>, he realizes, feeling stupid. <em>They’ve been perfectly civil</em>. The way you were with people you had to put up with but didn’t like. Elric might be new to this, but he’s the farthest thing in the world from stupid, and Derek had been as good as broadcasting his feelings by being <em>perfectly civil. </em></p><p>“I don’t… not like you,” he says, but even in his own ears it sounds defensive.</p><p>Elric rolls his eyes and snorts. “Whatever. You don’t have to like me. You’re not the first, you won’t be the last. Just don’t waste time pretending to be nice to me. It’s creepy.”</p><p>“So if you weren’t fishing for compliments, what did you want to talk to me about?” Derek asks, amused.</p><p>“First, I do not need to fish for compliments. I know when I’ve done a good job and when I’ve fucked up, okay? Second, will you please fucking say something to Reid already?”</p><p>Derek’s heart sinks. “Say something to Reid about what?” he asks, instantly concerned, wondering if Spencer had a relapse that Elric noticed but the rest of them missed.</p><p>For someone who does a remarkable job of keeping his cards close to his vest, Elric has an extremely animated face. It allows him to deliver a range of looks from “overwhelmed innocence” to “supreme condescension.” He’s leveling the second of those at Derek at the moment.</p><p>“I know this isn’t my place, okay? But if you two don’t stop dancing around each other, I’m going to do something drastic like lock you in a closet,” Elric says.</p><p>Derek’s mind—wondering if it was Spencer’s mom has had something happen or if Spencer himself is showing mental health issues—screeches to a halt at Elric’s words. Relief is the first feeling that washes through him, before the rest of what Elric said sinks in and Derek’s stomach sinks to his feet. He’s distantly glad for the fact that he doesn’t really pale with his complexion. “What are you talking about?” he asks, but his voice sounds faint in his own ears.</p><p>Elric levels another <em>you are not this stupid</em> look at him, which, under other circumstances, would almost be a backhanded compliment. “You <em>like</em> him—and you know what I mean, so don’t bother dissembling. And he likes you, but <em>he </em>is never going to make the first move on you. He thinks you’re totally straight. So if you actually want to do this, you’re going to have to get your head out of your ass and <em>do </em>something about it.”</p><p>Staring, feeling like he’s been kicked in the balls, Derek’s mouth opens, but no sound comes out. He closes it and tries again. “You’re right,” he croaks. He clears his throat and continues, “This is absolutely not your place.”</p><p>Rolling his eyes again, Elric says, “Yeah, I know. But as far as I can tell, there’s no anti-frat regs you need to worry about, and I’m serious. I don’t know if the others are just too close to it or they’ve just decided not to interfere, but if I keep seeing you making calf eyes behind each other’s backs, I’m going to do something drastic.”</p><p>“Reid does not—”</p><p>“He totally does, and so do you. So either be a fucking adult and fucking <em>do</em> something about it, or let it go once and for all,” Elric says, crossing his own arms. For the first time, he looks… vulnerable. It’s not an expression that belongs on Edward Elric’s face. Between the way Derek’s emotions are pinwheeling and the shock at seeing Elric look so pained, Derek can’t find anything to say, so Elric continues. “Look, this job is dangerous. You know that better than me. And maybe dating someone on the team will make it harder to do your job, but I doubt it. I bet it makes you better at it. Because when someone you care about is in the field, you fight a lot harder to make sure everyone makes it home in one piece.”</p><p>There is weight to those words, certainty that only comes from experience. Along with the weight, there is longing and loss and grief written plain on Elric’s face.</p><p>“It could mess up everything,” Derek says, because even though part of him is really pissed off at Elric about this, he’s finding it hard to get angry in the face of such obvious vulnerability.</p><p>“It could,” Elric concedes with a half shrug. “But this is a dangerous job, and if something happens, do you really want to live with the regret of not telling him?” Elric meets Derek’s eyes as he says it, and Derek has seen a thousand manifestations of suffering and loss in victim’s eyes over the years—Elric’s is as deep and bottomless as any of theirs. “If the worst happens, do you want to die with that regret?”</p><p>“No,” Derek says, the word pulled from somewhere deep in his chest. He’s not sure if it’s a denial, an answer to Elric’s question, or both.</p><p>“Then do something about it.” Elric pauses as he walks past Derek, reaches out, and puts a comforting hand on Derek’s shoulder. It startles Derek almost as much as the conversation has, because he can’t remember Elric willingly touching anyone before. Their eyes meet, and again, Derek is taken aback by the knowledge in them, the certainty.</p><p>The shutters close, and he gives Derek a shit-eating grin as he pats Derek’s shoulder one more time. “I’ll just leave you two to sort this out then,” he says before sweeping past Derek.</p><p>When Derek turns, sure enough, Spencer is standing in the doorway, looking almost like a deer in headlights, except deer don’t stare with fear-tinged hope. Elric pauses as he’s passing Spencer, says something too low for Derek to hear, then disappears out the door before Derek can chase him down and throttle him.</p><p>“I…” Spencer croaks, then has to stop and clear his throat. Derek almost laughs, understanding exactly how he feels. “I wanted to wait and make sure nothing was wrong,” he says, almost like a question. “I didn’t mean to eavesdrop. I—” He stops, the way he sometimes does when he has too many thoughts clamoring to be said at once and he can’t decide which should go first.</p><p>Derek looks at him, <em>really</em> looks at him, for the first time in a long time. He thinks back over the last year, but the last months especially, and hindsight is, as ever, 20/20, because the little touches from Spencer, who doesn’t touch. The way his eyes linger, even when his hands don’t. The way he stands just a little too close. It’s a thousand tiny things, and it’s annoying that Elric saw it and Derek was so busy convincing himself Spencer wouldn’t want him that he missed the signs entirely.</p><p>“Spencer,” he says, getting up and moving toward Spencer, keeping his voice gentle, even though his heart feels like it might beat out of his chest. A tiny smile curls Spencer’s lips, as if just the sound of Derek saying his name can make him happy. Derek’s heart breaks a little, because he missed the signs, and he might have entirely missed his chance if it weren’t for Elric. He stops just inside Spencer’s space, watches Spencer sway a fraction of an inch toward him, and feels every bit as stupid as Elric implied he was.</p><p>“Derek,” Spencer says mimicking his tone. His knuckles are white around the strap of his messenger bag, though his voice is deceptively even and he meets Derek’s eyes, not flinching.</p><p>It reminds Derek how much Spencer has grown, reminds him of the genius kid he was, and the genius man he’s become, and Derek is so in love with him, he can barely breathe around it. “How much did you overhear?” he asks, not accusatory, just curious.</p><p>“Pretty much… all of it,” Spencer admits, pressing his lips together in that weird awkward grin he has, the one he makes when he thinks he’s supposed to be happy but isn’t sure he is. He glances away, but his eyes are drawn back to Derek as if he can’t not look at him.</p><p>“Is Elric right?” Derek asks, because he needs to ask, needs to be sure, even though Spencer’s every move and look is screaming the truth. “Do you have feelings for me?”</p><p>Spencer laughs a nervous, almost disbelieving sound. “Of course I do,” he all but blurts. “How could I not? You’re smart and sincere and strong and kind and—well, look at you!” The words tumble over themselves. “The question shouldn’t be ‘if I have feelings for you,’ it should be ‘why doesn’t everyone?’”</p><p>Derek smiles, chest tight with how big his heart feels. He reaches up to tuck an errant hair behind Spencer’s ear, even though it’s not <em>quite</em> long enough to stay, so Derek ends up just stroking it back.</p><p>“And you?” Spencer challenges, reaching up and stilling Derek’s hand. “Is Ed right about you too?”</p><p>“Of course he is,” Derek says, unable to deny it to Spencer’s face any more than he could to Elric’s. “You’re smart and sincere and strong and kind… and look at you,” he repeats Spencer’s words back to him. “The question shouldn’t be ‘if I have feelings for you.’ It should be ‘why doesn’t everyone?’”</p><p>Spencer blinks furiously as tears threaten, but they’re tears of joy and relief, not sorrow, and Derek’s own vision is getting a little misty as they both smile big enough to hurt. Telling Spencer, knowing that Spencer returns his feelings, it lifts a tremendous weight from his shoulders he hadn’t known he was carrying.</p><p>“Can I kiss you?” Derek asks.</p><p>“Oh, God, please.” They both take a step forward, closing the remaining distance between them, hands clutching at each other like they’re the only solid thing in the world. They are exactly the same height, which means that neither has to bend or crane, just a slight tilt of the head, and they’re kissing. It’s hard and needy and almost worshipful as they attempt to convey their emotions through the one touch, and it’s perfect.</p><p>They have to break to breathe, or Spencer needs to anyway. He bends his head to rest his forehead against Derek’s shoulder, but doesn’t move away. Derek looks forward to teaching him to breathe while kissing so they can go for much longer in the future. Derek rubs Spencer’s back for a moment before asking, “Still with me, pretty boy?”</p><p>In response, Spencer presses closer to Derek, hands tightening on Derek’s shirt. “Still here,” he mumbles into Derek’s shoulder. “Just afraid it’s a dream.”</p><p>Derek lifts his hand to cup rest on the nape of Spencer’s neck, willing to let him lean against him for as long as he needs. “It is definitely not a dream,” Derek says, at least as much to reassure himself as to reassure Spencer.</p><p>Spencer chuckles into his shoulder, then lifts his head, meeting Derek’s eyes. “I just had a thought.”</p><p>“And what’s that?”</p><p>“We are both going to owe Ed a hell of a thank you.”</p><p>Derek pulls back a little bit. “No, we will not,” he says.</p><p>But Spencer is grinning at him, like he knows that Derek agrees. “Would you have said something if he hadn’t pushed you? Because without concrete evidence that you’d welcome my advances, there was no way on earth I would have said anything.”</p><p>“That doesn’t mean I have to like him,” Derek finally says, grumpy. It gets him another radiant smile from Spencer.</p><p>“Obviously not,” he says, and Derek knows when he’s being humored.</p><p>“Enough about Elric,” Derek says. “Can I take you home?”</p><p>Since they are the same height, Spencer shouldn’t be able to look up through his eyelashes at Derek, but he manages to anyway when he says, “Only if you’re coming too.”</p><p>Derek kisses him again for it, and has no regrets.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Because I posted the last chapter of Nothing Beautiful stupidly late (or early, depending on your definition), I didn't realize it was October 3rd. So now I'm using it as a delayed excuse to post early again. Which means Impressions is fully posted. </p><p>I hope everyone enjoyed! These were at turns tricky and a lot of fun to write, and I absolutely love this last scene. Drop me a comment and let me know what you loved!</p>
        </blockquote><div class="children module" id="children">
  <b class="heading">Works inspired by this one:</b>
  <ul>
    <li>
        <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30267819">[Podfic] Impressions - a Wreckage Sidefic</a> by <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/mistbornhero/pseuds/mistbornhero">mistbornhero</a>
    </li>
  </ul>
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